Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Christmas in my Heart

Bisperas na ng Pasko.

Somehow I feel that tonight I have a better chance of meeting my God if I don’t go to church. So I decided to stay behind and do nothing but think about God’s goodness to me. I’m the only one here but I don’t feel alone at all (spooky? read on). I have this warm feeling that while I’m typing this God is beside me reading what’s on the screen, glancing at the keyboard and smiling at me. (I’m starting to cry) God has been very good to me this year. He’s always been good every year. I’m so grateful for everything He has done. Some I don’t understand.. yet; but what’s my mind compared to him. Napaka buti talaga ng Panginoon. Di Siya matatawaran, di matutumbasan. Ayan! Mas maganda talaga kung sasabihin ko sa sariling wika.

Christmas is in my Heart.. baduy ng title ko noh?.. pero iyan lang talaga ang pinaka simple’t walang paikut-ikot na mga salita ang naiisip ko. Wala si Marvin kaya walang mapagtanungan. Pero pasko naman kaya magprangkahan na tayo. Christmas (sabay biglang nag English) is different this year. Its calm; peaceful; serene. I can see the color in the lanterns. I can understand the their lights as they turn on and off. Maybe because the things that create turmoil in life are all removed. All the empty things that I hold on to are not present anymore.

This Christmas let God be my only focus; my only anchor; my one destination. I realized His goodness, His love, His ultimate sacrifice. As corny as this may sound, Christmas isn’t in the presents, it isn’t in the boyfriend (which everybody insists that I must have, immediately) it isn’t in the paycheck, it isn’t in material things. It took me this long to realize that. Matured na yata ako.. finally!

Maligayang Pasko! :-)